Burning Question: What does the drink you order say about you?

There are bits of conventional wisdom that just sound right.

For instance, “Don’t judge a book by its cover” is a valuable warning. A Jaguar salesperson once pointed out that someone interested only in hopping behind the wheel for a fun test drive will dress the part, while guys in shorts and rumpled T-shirts had paid cash.

So the notion that the drink a person orders is a window into their character sounds plausible. After all, what 1990s soccer mom didn’t sip Chardonnay?

“The drink says a thousand words,” observes Colleen Kelly, mixologist at Lucia Restaurant & Bar in Carmel Valley’s Bernardus Lodge. Yet while she points out that veteran bartenders can anticipate an order with a degree of accuracy—“I can see someone across the room and think ‘Sauvignon Blanc’”—Kelly is hesitant to give the connection between the drink and the person too much significance.

Others aren’t so skeptical. A trip through the internet will inform you with certainty that whiskey drinkers are “more likely to be a bad boyfriend.” Of course, another source labels this same group as confident and worldly sorts.

Contradictions also pop up when the internet considers rum. These people are sensible, according to one of the many sites and stories dedicated to the topic. But in a survey of 30 bartenders, Business Insider learned that rum conveys a “frat boy” mentality—apparently usurping the role of vodka and Red Bull.

Admittedly, 30 is a rather small sample size. For the most part conclusions on the matter are anecdotal. 

Australian scholars Peter K. Jonason, Daniel Talbot and Joel Anderson took a stab at an academic approach, publishing “What People Drink and Where They Drink: It Can Inform Us About Their Personality” in the journal Psychological Topics. They determined that beer and wine drinkers were personally satisfied with life while those who preferred spirits were more neurotic.

Yet there are a few big caveats to their research. To start with, they surveyed only white, educated, financially comfortable Australians—arguably from a culture that give beer preference. And although some outlets made much of their study, the authors themselves concluded that choice of drink actually provided little insight into personality.

They also agreed that much more research is needed. So, grant money well used.

So can you really tell something about a person from their drink of choice?

“Maybe,” shrugs Katie Blandin, owner of the cocktail destination Pearl Hour in Monterey. “You can tell the flavors they like.”

Kelly explains that within those 1,000 words are many layers, nuances, extenuating circumstances and experience levels. Alcohol novices tend toward simpler, sweeter cocktails, for example.

“While a classic cocktail says ‘I know what I want,’ novices know what they want, too,” Kelly says. “It takes confidence to order a White Zinfandel.”

“Everybody was ordering espresso martinis last night,” Blandin adds. It is the cocktail of the moment, but Pearl Hour was not entertaining a crowd of hipsters. The previous evening in this case also happened to fall on National Espresso Martini Day. 

The next night—March 17—pints of green beer might have been the call at bars across the country.

Hence the many contradictions when people relate drink to character. The question is much more involved than folklore will allow.

Blandin and Kelly suggest that a drink order says more about mood and circumstance than a person’s character.

“I had someone ask, ‘What wine do you like to drink?’ Kelly recalls. “I said, ‘It’s emotional.’ A lot of beverage selection is how you’re feeling at that moment.”

So the answer to this week’s Burning Question is in a bit of limbo. A person’s order indeed says something. But it may speak much more to their maturity level and the situation than any personality trait.

What would the Burning Question crew order? Kelly pretty much nailed it, first guess. So…