SQUIDFRY 10.18.18: Smoke Signal…

SMOKE SIGNAL… The world, it seems to Squid, is going crazy these days, and whether it’s a fire, flood or journalist getting murdered, it seems another depressing story is always right around the corner. Or as Squid has heard some refer to the state of affairs, it’s a dumpster fire, and the only thing that can keep it under control is a steady stream of cute animal videos.

So when Squid heard the Monterey Regional Airport got evacuated Oct. 10 due to a fire, Squid immediately thought the worst – something far worse than an actual dumpster fire. But the reality, Squid’s colleague learned, turned out to be far more entertaining: An airline employee inadvertently set off the fire alarm while heating a Hot Pocket for too long in a microwave. The evacuation, Airport General Manager Mike La Pier says, only lasted about 10 minutes until the cause of the alarm was identified and firefighters we able to turn off the alarm. “That terminal stinks to high heaven,” Airport board member Mary Ann Leffel said Oct. 10, adding the airport was “the victim of a Hot Pocket.” La Pier says only two passengers were in the holding room and had to re-enter security, and that the incident didn’t delay any flights. Still, he says, there is a takeaway from the whole thing: “The moral of the story is don’t eat Hot Pockets.”

NUMBERS GAME… Sometimes Squid feels like reality is as slippery as Squid’s cephalopod skin. If the Saudis say it’s true, President Donald Trump assumes it must be. If Kanye West says he gets superpowers from his MAGA hat – well, Squid’s not sure what to make of Kanye. Squid is busy scratching Squid’s head over an ongoing dispute in Seaside City Hall over the campaign finance filings of councilmember and mayoral candidate Kayla Jones.

On Sept. 24, City Clerk Lesley Milton-Rerig sent Jones a letter telling her to expect $10-a-day late fees to accrue for two late forms: a campaign finance report for 2017 detailing activity in the Jones For Council 2016 committee and a new committee formation for her mayoral campaign. Both documents are now safely filed, but Milton-Rerig is preparing to issue a citation any day – for forms filed 236 and 55 days late – for some $3,000 in fines. Jones claims she filed both forms on time and the city clerk misplaced them.

Squid is left wondering why so much drama over so little: The 2017 fundraising document (now viewable on the city’s website) shows zero dollars raised – not an election year – and $54.74 spent for stationery and proofreading. That $0 figure matters because of California Elections Code, section 91013(c), which says: “No liability under this section shall exceed the cumulative amount stated in the late statement or report, or $100, whichever is greater.” That’s an amount even Squid could raise in a bake sale.