Fantasy lives abound in cyberspace,but who you get may not be who you want.

Here''s a quickie rundown on what the desperate male might do to get himself some rapture. However, this also can be fun. Meeting people on the Internet and having "cybersex" is something relatively new. It offers a stimulating environment built upon the greatest 3D-effects processor on the planet--your brain.

Online you can look like Antonio Banderas and the other person can be anything he, she or it wants to be--and you''ll suspend your disbelief to have that fantasy. Still, it can also be a terrible way to convince yourself that someone out there really wants you.

Cybersex is definitely not a recommended method of finding true love. But you can check how many desperate men and women there are in the world.

On some online services, folks frequently change their screen names--or handles, as they call them. One night, in a fit of curiosity over just how desperate and repressed the modern American male is, I signed onto a sex chat board with the handle SexySuzie.

I sat back and waited. In about two minutes I had 25 separate Instant Message windows tiled across my computer screen. They all were from men looking for a free cyberdate with my made-up little fantasy girl. I played around for a bit with each one before finally breaking the news that I was a man. I certainly hope they are all crying in the shower with a bar of soap to chew on.

In Monterey County, cybersex seems to be the most popular among very young girls and very old married men. The few people I spoke with seemed happy to create fantasies as long as they weren''t carried too far. However, a second thing to remember is that most services carry a directory of members real names--and this can get you into a bit trouble.