SQUIDFRY 12.31.20: Just Say Aloha…

JUST SAY ALOHA… In this year of weird, Squid thought nothing could surprise Squid anymore. But then came news, published in the Ecological Society of America journal on Dec. 18, that scientists had discovered the essence of the year contained in the arms of Squid’s kindred spirit, the octopus: Less coy than Squid, octopuses use their eight arms to punch fish – for no reason other than aggression or spite.

Squid was not surprised to find out that octopuses do that (all cephalopods know that fish are dumb and annoying) but Squid was surprised to see humans react so strongly to the news with words like “angry” and “bizarre.” To Squid, it’s humans who are the bizarre ones. After all, it’s humans who have committed to protesting every Sunday afternoon of 2021 at Window on the Bay. The group Monterey Bay Patriots is promoting the “Freedom Rallies” under the banner “Four More Years,” perhaps not realizing their candidate lost the presidential election.

Their flier says they are supported by the Monterey County Republican Party, Monterey County Republican community and the anti-vax group Latinos For Medical Freedom. That last one especially strikes Squid as ironic given that vaccines are our ticket to freedom from Covid-19 lockdowns, given our own failures to stop the spread.

Speaking of which, there’s more irony: Richard Dunnuck is a new poster child for Monterey Bay Patriots. He’s the proprietor of Aloha Coffee & Cafe (just across the street from the popular protest spot and next-door to the Republican HQ). For his refusal to wear a mask and suspend sit-down service, the Monterey County Health Department eventually proceeded with an application to revoke his health permit, an application that was granted by Administrative Law Judge Jacqueline Pierce on Dec. 23.

“Covid-19 is not a matter of opinion and Mr. Dunnuck should be held accountable for his lack of compliance with the order of the Health Department,” Pierce wrote in her decision.

Despite losing his health permit, Dunnuck was still serving coffee a week later, with a “cup of freedom” special. He wore a face shield but no mask, per his claim that his religious conviction and a medical condition prevent him from wearing a mask; when Squid’s colleague asked for details, he replied: “It’s illegal to ask.” (It’s not.) Meanwhile, the Health Department suspended the permit from The Tuck Box in Carmel for continuing to serve sit-down meals, and the District Attorney’s Office is seeking $20,000 in penalties.

Like the punchy octopus stealing all the attention in the cephalopod realm, Squid is tired of the violators stealing all the attention when the overwhelming majority are complying with shelter-in-place. Squid’s New Year’s resolution is this: to remember, despite all the weirdos out there, that most of us are decent.