SQUIDFRY 12.21.17: Feeling Festivus

FEELING FESTIVUS… Squid knows that Squid has a reputation out there for being a little self-obsessed; it is Squid’s job, after all, to listen in, especially while people are talking about Squid. But even Squid loves the tingly feeling of happiness that comes from giving spot-on presents, and this holiday season, Squid is going on a shopping spree.

For Carmel Mayor Steve Dallas, a cup of coffee (and a smile!) at Carmel Cocoa and Coffee Bar, where he objects to the wall-mounted photo menu. For Carmel City Attorney Glen Mozingo, a big shiny gold-wrapped chocolate medal to go with the U.S. Congressional Gold Medal and U.S. Congressional Medal of Distinction he listed on his resume for the job – despite the fact that they’re just thank-you schwag from the Republican Party. (Squid found one on eBay for $19.99 – those could make affordable stocking stuffers, too.)

For County Supervisor Luis Alejo and Assemblymember Anna Caballero, gloves as they’re getting ready to run against each other for State Senate in 2018.

For Del Rey Oaks Mayor Jerry Edelen, a week at a summer science camp, hoping to remedy his declaration that the scientific studies he’s seen concerningCemex and sand erosion “weren’t worth a doodle,” and that the idea of climate change is “unproven,” at a June 2 Monterey County Mayors Associationmeeting.

For Salinas City Council, a raised bed for a veggie garden to compensate for the 400-plus acres of ag land they’re paving over, and a farmers market stand to sell produce so they can start raising money for their legal defense fund when the inevitable lawsuits start rolling in. For Superintendent Dan Burns – and the entire Salinas Union High School District board – an umbrella to help remind them that yes, even in drought-stricken California it sometimes rains, and that weather can cause serious construction delays, as with the future Rancho San Juan High.

Margaret-Anne Coppernoll, a trustee of Monterey Peninsula College, gets a DVD of the movie Titanic for reference; she waxed poetic at a May 31 board meeting about MPC President Walt Tribley and his abilities as a leader, saying: “If he had been at the helm of the Titanic, the Titanic would not have hit a glacier and perished.” (Meanwhile, the faculty union is still without a contract.) For Juanita Perea, executive director of Oasis Charter School where aggrieved parents are so angry at management some are removing their children, a copy machine so she can send negative letters to all of the parents.

For Kevin Dayton, an anti-tax flack who represents the Salinas Taxpayers Association, the Salinas City Center Improvement Association and Salinas Valley Chamber of Commerce, a tax plan that redistributes wealth to help the rich get richer – oh wait, President Donald Trump beat Squid to that one already.