SQUID FRY 04.14.16: Check Mate…

CHECK MATE… Sadly, Squid must admit, Squid does not often get offered a free lunch. In many cases, of course, it would unethical for Squid to accept said free lunch, but at least the offer would lift Squid’s spirits.

Seaside City Manager Craig Malin, however, has a different problem: Man, do people want buy that guy lunch. On April 7, Malin was invited to the clubhouse of the Bayonet and Blackhorse golf course, where he had lunch with the principals of Seaside Resort Development, LLC, the company that owns the courses, and which proposes to build a luxury hotel at the site. When Malin asked for the check, he was told there was no check – they own the clubhouse! Malin returned the next day and gave a waitress a $40 payment/tip to the waitress.

On April 9, Malin attended a lunch gathering of local ministers at the invite of Rev. H.H. Lusk. To Malin’s dismay, wannabe District 4 Supe Dennis Donohue gave a talk about the coming election. “While appreciating the good intent, I can’t attend political events or accept free lunches,” Malin writes in an email, adding that Donohue contributed to the lunch. “So the Ministerial Alliance will be getting a $20 check.”

Squid wants to take this guy out to lunch.

LIT 101… As a young Squidlet, Squid wanted to be pals with the cool kids. But with a dark sense of humor and sickly complexion from too much time in front of the computer, Squid was anything but cool.

But that has helped Squid find Squid’s spirit animals in this year’s contentious county supervisor races. Mary Adams, super popular for her work as United Way chief, and Dennis Donohue, Cuddly Hero of the Masses and former mayor of Salinas, have more in common than the same slogan. (Adams’ lit, who’s running for the 5th District seat against Dave Potter, reads “A Supervisor on OUR Side”; Donohue, who’s running for the 4th District against Jane Parker, has lit that reads “Dennis Donohue: On Our Side.”

Guess whose literature came out second? Go on, guess.

“I guess Squid must be feeling the effects of a disappointing commercial crab season to dip this deep into campaign literature,” says Donohue campaign manager Steve Thomas. “Honestly, it’s a non-issue.”

Maybe unrepentant copycatting is the secret to being cool.

A squeeworthy note: Donohue booster Jerry Edelen, mayor of Del Rey Oaks, confirms Squid is on the cool kids’ radar. At a recent campaign lunch they attended, Donohue made sure no one confused “Squid Row” comic author Bridgett Spicer, who was there, with this Squid. “It’s different from the Squid! She’s not the Squid!” he announced. Seems Donohue’s not-so-secretly wishing he had the support of this socially awkward Squid. Which is cool.