SQUID FRY 03.19.15: Pot Pie…

POT PIE… Squid admits to a few weak attempts at entrepreneurship. At lemonade stands as a Squidlet, Squid guzzled all the lemonade Squidself. Once Squid tried peddling candy, to much the same effect. Then when Squid was older and more serious, Squid tried with homemade shrimp pot pies. They didn’t sell well, and now Squid finally understands why: They were missing actual pot.

Forget the fact that legalization is just a pipe dream. Some entrepreneurial types are already hawking bud on Craigslist. There, Squid found all Squid could ever smoke (assuming Squid ever gets to the doctor about that achy tentacle, that is). There’s White Russian marijuana, with a “super loud smell and taste,” for $20 a gram. Alien OG, greenhouse-grown near Gilroy, goes for $150 an ounce. Green Krack and Star Dawg are pricier, at $190 an ounce.

Squid’s OK with full legalization and figures it’s coming anyway, as do lawyers like Gavin Kogan and food biz magnates like Rob Weakley (see story, p. 22). But part of what Squid likes is the idea of tax revenue to help government enforce the rules on cannabusiness.

So Squid’s a little bummed to see people already cutting corners and evading taxes. Which reminds Squid, it’s time to do Squid’s taxes. After the munchies pass. First, Squid needs a slice of shrimp pot pie.

HORSESHOES AND HAND GRENADES… Squid knows awkward. Like when Squid waves eagerly to a harbor seal pal, only to realize (OMG) it’s an unknown sea lion. So Squid can sympathize with Seaside Mayor Ralph Rubio, who was in the mother of all awkward positions at the March 13 Fort Ord Reuse Authority meeting. That’s where Marina Coast Water District asked FORA to sign on to a desalination plant to supply future Fort Ord development. In the front row: Monterey Downs developerBrian Boudreau, who probably wants Marina Coast’s desal plant to move fast so he can claim his proposed horse park has an actual water supply.

Rubio, who wants Monterey Downs annexed into Seaside, tried to argue for the Marina Coast desal project. He really did. It’s just that his other pet desal project happens to be California American Water’s. And a Marina Coast project would clearly compete with a Cal Am one.

Then things got nasty: Cal Am attorney Tony Lombardo called Marina Coast “dangerous.” Del Rey Oaks Mayor Jerry Edelen called Lombardo a “major party pooper.” Then Edelen declared war between Cal Am and Marina Coast, taking the metaphor all the way to Marina Coast throat-cutting if Cal Am’s project isn’t built.

Poor Ralph. Squid could see him squirming. In the end, he got out without too many bruises, and the FORA board skirted the heavy issues and voted simply to receive the report. Good save. Maybe pot pie would’ve helped.